Chapter 1: Why Well-Being Matters
Beyond Self Care
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Guests
Dr Brendan Kwiatkowski is a former secondary school teacher in BC and his research focuses on adolescent boys’ relationship with masculinity and emotions. He is passionate about many things including social emotional learning, social justice, and helping foster healthy and healing relationships within oneself and others.
Vanessa White is currently a district principal for your safe and healthy schools in the BC School District because we're getting K-12 as a teacher a counselor and has focused much of her career on social emotional learning educator wellness and resilience
Dr Shirley Giroux has worked with Learners from Early Childhood to post-secondary she's a registered clinical counselor and the school counselor where she works half time at the elementary school and half time at the secondary. In 2021 Shirley completed a certification as a compassionate systems leadership Master Practitioner at the Center for Systems Awareness at MIT. Based on her PhD research, Shirley works on behalf of school-wide and particular educator will be in a variety of settings across Canada and beyond.
Book Club Notes & Take-aways
The conversation began with a simple question: Where did you highlight or put sticky notes? This sparked a rich discussion about using data to support decisions, particularly in advocating for initiatives that are hard to measure.
Making the Case for Well-Being with Data
Vanessa White shared that she’s a “highlighter person” and was struck by the data supporting the business case for social-emotional initiatives. “Data is crucial when trying to push these initiatives forward,” she explained. “I often have to make tough budget decisions, and knowing the impact through solid data makes those choices easier.”
Vanessa emphasized that while the value of these initiatives may feel obvious, emotional reasoning alone isn’t enough to sway financial decision-makers. “Being able to show research that demonstrates long-term cost savings gives the argument more weight,” she noted. “You know in your heart it’s the right thing to do, but sometimes ‘it’s in my heart’ doesn’t cut it.”
The Financial Impact of Teacher Retention
Dr. Shirley Giroux highlighted the importance of teacher retention, emphasizing that it’s more cost-effective to keep teachers than to recruit and train new ones. She pointed out that this is particularly relevant in rural and remote areas where teacher shortages are common.
“It’s not just a northern issue—many communities struggle to find teachers, let alone keep them,” Dr. Giroux explained. “We need to support the teachers already in these communities so they can stay connected to their work and purpose.” She stressed that addressing systemic needs is key to building environments where educators feel valued and motivated to stay.
Rethinking New Teacher Assignments
Dr. Brendan Kwiatkowski offered a thought-provoking perspective on how schools allocate teaching assignments. “It’s so backwards that new teachers get a mixed bag of subjects to teach, while experienced teachers get to repeat courses they’ve mastered over time,” he remarked. “We bring in highly motivated new teachers and then overwhelm them with topics they’re not comfortable with, which can lead to burnout.”
He linked this traditional approach to higher attrition rates and emphasized the need for a more supportive structure that allows new teachers to build confidence and expertise. “This ‘do your time’ mentality isn’t healthy and ultimately affects retention,” he concluded.
“My big thing is about teaching social emotional skills and learning to students and I think that as much as education systems are moving towards that, at the end of the day one of the most powerful ways to teach students is to model that. If teachers are having a sordid relationship with their own emotional well-being and mental health it’s going to impact their ability to actually demonstrate regulation skills in real time.”
Education as a Vocation
Nurturing Purpose and Well-being
Dr. Shirley Giroux reflected on the vocational nature of teaching, where many educators feel a sense of calling. “Teaching is more than just a job; it’s something people feel drawn to,” she explained. “Staying connected to that sense of purpose is vital for overall well-being.”
She emphasized the importance of creating environments where educators feel valued and supported. “How do we sustain these spaces where people are connected to their purpose? You know it when you walk into a school that cares for its staff,” she noted. “It’s about nurturing that sense of vocation that keeps teachers engaged and fulfilled.”
Teaching the Whole Child
Vanessa White shared her personal journey of discovering a more holistic approach to teaching when she transitioned to elementary education. “I realized there was a different way of looking at education,” she said. “It’s about teaching the whole child—social and emotional development alongside academic content. How do you weave those two things together?”
Her insights underscored the importance of balancing emotional well-being with educational outcomes, highlighting the need for systemic changes in how schools approach teaching and learning.
Balancing Logic and Emotion
Dr. Brendan Kwiatkowski explored the tension between using data to justify social-emotional initiatives and the need for emotional resonance. “Can we logically think our way to emotional well-being?” he asked. “Sometimes data is the path, but I wonder how much skepticism people have about being too ‘touchy-feely.’”
He praised the emphasis on embodiment and the importance of reconnecting with our bodies. “Your book really highlights the importance of noticing what’s happening in our nervous systems,” he noted. “Understanding that connection is crucial for emotional well-being.”
Noticing Stress in Our Bodies
Addiction to Stress
Dr. Brendan Kwiatkowski discussed how stress can become an addictive cycle. “Our nervous systems can get so accustomed to chaos that it feels normal,” he explained. “Your first step is to notice it—what’s happening in your body? It’s hard work but essential for breaking the cycle.”
He emphasized the importance of embodiment, noting that the body sends nine times more signals to the brain than the brain sends to the body. “Our bodies are constantly communicating with us,” he said. “We just need to learn to listen.”
Immune to Stress Signals
Vanessa White shared her personal experience of being “immune” to stress signals. “I just kept going and going, compartmentalizing my physical discomfort,” she revealed. “I was so busy that I couldn’t take the time to become self-aware.”
She also noted a disconnect in how children perceive their health. “Kids often see social-emotional issues as ‘neck up’ and physical issues as ‘neck down.’ They don’t always connect their thoughts and feelings with how their bodies react,” she explained.
Learning to Feel Feelings
Gail Markin highlighted a key challenge: many adults haven’t learned to recognize their physical reactions to emotions. “I often ask groups where they feel emotions in their bodies, and many don’t know,” she shared. “We need to teach this awareness, starting with educators.”
Presenteeism
The panel also explored the concept of “presenteeism”—being physically present but not fully engaged—a growing concern in educational settings. Dr. Brendan Kwiatkowski discussed the idea of presenteeism as the opposite of absenteeism. “It’s about being there but not fully showing up,” he explained. “Educators who feel undervalued or exhausted protect themselves by emotionally checking out.”
A Workplace Reality
Gail Markin noted that presenteeism isn’t unique to education; it’s a widespread workplace issue. “It comes from a place of hurt or feeling undervalued,” she said. “Imagine being in a workplace where you can’t fully engage—that’s hard on you and the people you serve.”
She connected this to the “contagion effect,” where disengagement impacts the entire school culture. “Let’s talk about presenteeism because nobody wants it, but it’s happening,” she urged.
The Power of Recognition
Vanessa White emphasized the importance of feeling valued. “Just a simple thank you or acknowledgment of the time and effort you’ve given can keep people engaged,” she noted. “Recognition matters more than we realize.”
Different Things Light Us Up
Identity and Vocation
Dr. Shirley Giroux explained that teaching is closely tied to identity. “Teachers often see their work as part of who they are,” she said. “That’s why presenteeism can be so damaging—it disconnects them from their purpose.”
She suggested a simple but powerful approach: noticing what lights people up. “If you see a teacher who comes alive when they’re doing a certain activity, encourage them to do more of that,” she explained. “Help them stay connected to what they love, and they’ll bring that joy to their students.”
“Sometimes it’s just starting up the conversation that says - why do we do it like that? is that the way it has to work? We have a system that’s existed and a way of being that when we just start to talk about it through that lens of well-being we may make different decisions or at least try different things. ”